My Own Private Hell

I dreamt of you last night, were you there?
You made me cry last night, do you care?

The pain you gave me, destroyed my day.
If I knew you cared, I would ask you to stay.

You lied to me, hid behind my back.
But when I found out, my life went off track.

How could you keep that from me, hide him right in front of my face.
You should not have done that to me, that’s not your place.

But it was my dream you say, it’s not for real.
It never happened, it’s no big deal.

Yet you kill me inside, dying to be free.
If given the chance, you would hurt me.

But I stay anyway, locked in this jail.
This place I created, my own private hell.

Depressed Brain

Depressed brain of an idle mind.

I weep in sadness with a confused heart.

I hope for joy, but expect none.

Emptiness haunts my spirit and soul.

Devastation is the world I’ve created.

The pain I carry is mine to bear.

Each day that passes, I die inside.

When tomorrow comes, I hope to be gone.

Why do you?

Why do you hurt me?
Why do I cry?

You don’t deserve me.
Why must you lie?

Gone with the wind.
My spirit and soul.

Dying to be free.
Can’t let you go.

Why can’t you love me?
Why do I still care?

Can’t bear the pain.
Why is life so unfair?

Sleep

No time to sleep
No time to breath
Rush through life
Search for everything
Find nothing
Tomorrow is today
Today is already gone
Left behind
Random thoughts
Tired eyes
Old souls
Special people
Disconnected
Extreme pain
Darkness comes
Life fades
Goodnight…

…Goodbye

Love Lost

Burning desire I cannot hide.
I look into your eyes, why do you not care?
Love lost for unspoken reasons.
I cry inside, but hide the pain.
You smile at me, but my heart knows you do not care.
I hang on to nothing in hopes of anything.
Living a life I cannot bear.
One day closer to ending it all.
Please let me go so I can heal.
Days, weeks, months go by.
I am hollow inside.
I beg for strength, but find none.
One last smile before I go.
My heart is now broken, and so am I.
Goodbye.

Survive

Lost in the moment
Living for today with no sight of tomorrow
A smile on my face hides the pain inside
Short burst of happiness
Hanging onto anything instead of having nothing
Scared, afraid, lonely
Weeks, months, years go bye
Long-term happiness nowhere in sight
I push to go on…

I push to survive

Why go on

Bitter love
Sweet hate
An entire life to contemplate.

Sweet sadness
Painful glee
Finding happiness in tragedy.

A happy goodbye
A sad hello
Why go on, I do not know.

Foreseen beginning
A known end
It is time to go, goodbye my friends.