Falling Down the Upward Staircase

Falling down the upward staircase.
One step at a time, each moment of my life.
The harder I try, the faster it all slips away.Why do I try?
Why do I continue to fight?

Marvelously bright light at the top and vast darkness at the bottom.
And here I am, stuck in the middle.
Constantly fighting and falling.
Struggling to survive.

Damn you staircase!
If only you would stop moving, perhaps I might be able to catch my step!

How do you find balance in a world that won’t stop moving?
How do I make this downward spiral stop?

Maybe I should just let go.
Give into the darkness and all that it hides.
Let it consume me and end my pain.
Accept that resistance is futile and my future is lost.

But alas, I cannot give up.
I am bound by this staircase, this never ending nightmare.
This vicious cycle that is my life.
To proud to give up, yet too weak to break free.

And so I remain.
Trapped for eternity.
Falling down the upward staircase.

Lines In the Sand

Shattered lives of an unlived fantasy.
I hear the breeze, but cannot feel the warmth.
Flowers bloom, but do not smile.
Lost at sea, I drift awhile.

Life goes by, yet I remain the same.
The beast within, I cannot tame.

A hidden world you cannot see.
One moment in time.
A lifetime to me.

I smell your hair, yet you’re not there.
Sweetness left empty.
I live in despair.

Memories and dreams.
What is real?
A life of fantasy not revealed.

Still I go on.
A broken man.
Peaceful journey?
Or just lines in the sand.

Despair

Lost in a sea of despair I drift.

No end in sight and nothing to hope for.

Sadness darkens my heart.

Numb to life and all that it holds.

Ready to sink, ready to give up.

The water is cold, and so is my heart.

Please take me now as I don’t want to be here.

The end is in sight, but not the one I want.

No turning back now, I made my choice.

Goodbye.

Love Lost

Burning desire I cannot hide.
I look into your eyes, why do you not care?
Love lost for unspoken reasons.
I cry inside, but hide the pain.
You smile at me, but my heart knows you do not care.
I hang on to nothing in hopes of anything.
Living a life I cannot bear.
One day closer to ending it all.
Please let me go so I can heal.
Days, weeks, months go by.
I am hollow inside.
I beg for strength, but find none.
One last smile before I go.
My heart is now broken, and so am I.
Goodbye.

Survive

Lost in the moment
Living for today with no sight of tomorrow
A smile on my face hides the pain inside
Short burst of happiness
Hanging onto anything instead of having nothing
Scared, afraid, lonely
Weeks, months, years go bye
Long-term happiness nowhere in sight
I push to go on…

I push to survive

Lost

Set a drift, lost in thought
Remembering the past, things were simple then
Lost inside myself, no way out
Darkness all around, no light in sight
Stumbling to find a way, to get back on track
The journey ahead, is this the beginning or the end?
No strength to continue, ready to give up
Must continue, must push myself cause that’s what I do
Will I make it in the end, only time will tell?

Until then, I guess I am just lost!